Ideals

I have been asked to reflect on the ideals written in the NAEYC and DEC codes of ethics and discuss three ideals that speak to me and explain their significance to me professionally. But before I do that, I want to first say that my number one principle, one that is shared by the NAEYC, as well as most people who are working in their integrity in this field, is to do no harm. I will always check everything I do and say against this principle before I proceed in whatever I am doing. Now that that's said, here are the ideals that I have chosen...


1) To listen to families, acknowledge and build upon their strengths and competencies, and learn from families as we support them in their task of nurturing children (1-2.4 NAEYC Code of Ethics).

This ideal lies at the heart of the way that I approach all the work I do with young families. Listening and connecting are the first and most important tools that I use to assess, comfort, and devise a plan to help each individual and family. This approach is based in brain science and has proven to be effective and healing for all involved. I learn from the strengths and struggles of each family that I work with and it aids me in my professional and personal life. I will always be working to improve my ability to listen well. That is, I will be working to listen with more openness and compassion, and with less judgment or preconceived ideas. The simple act of listening heals and serves to validate the needs of parents and children. It allows them to feel valuable and build self-esteem, and, therefore, to learn. The act of listening can transform the world and, in my opinion, may just be they key to world peace.

2)We shall demonstrate our respect and concern for children, families, colleagues, and others with whom we work, honoring their beliefs, values, customs, languages, and culture.

This ideal, taken from the Division of Early Childhood's Code of Ethics is basic to my approach, as well. It is integral to one of my guiding professional principles, which is to meet each family where they are at. This means that my ability to help is based on my ability to understand, take into account,  and work with the whole of a family's situation. I need to look at the circumstances, needs, wants, and worries of each individual family member and those of the family as a whole in order to do good work.

3) To welcome all family members and encourage them to participate in the program (1-2.3 NAEYC Code of Ethics).

I learned from my infant sleep consulting mentor, Angelique Millette, PhD, that I am the most effective when I am moving at the pace of whatever family member needs to move the slowest. This applies quite directly in sleep consulting to getting all members of the family to act as a united team that is as free of worry and stress as possible, but it also translates to all of the work I do. Even when I work in groups of  mothers and their partners aren't present, I have to take into account the affect that my words and attitude will have on that partnership and, therefore, on their baby or child. When I address the needs of one mom in a group, I have to address the needs of all women in the room or I risk alienating someone else. Since my guiding goal is first to do no harm, I have to work to consider all members of a family or group at all times. This sometimes means thinking a few steps ahead, but I find this is a skill that can become quite second nature with practice.

I hope that you have found these ideas interesting and maybe even inspiring. They are the ideals that guide my work every day.

Thank you to all of you who are out there trying to help our wonderful children. We have a lot of work to do and I am so happy to have such wonderful colleagues!

Best,
Lauren